MAY 21, 2020
I like the term “Mentor Match.” To me it is more than just being a mentor. It is “People helping people along with helping yourself.” Now that is a WIN/WIN. John Maxwell tells us, “It is hard to improve when you have no one but yourself to follow.” Who else are YOU following in your life besides yourself? Yes, you might be secretly trying to emulate some super stud football, basketball or baseball player. But are just watching them or are you actually getting off of the couch and practicing your skill to become better at something? I assume we have all had some sort of mentor in our past. It might have been a teacher, a coach, or maybe it was our parents. GREAT. Keep that thought but start thinking of someone who might be able to challenge you or take you further in life. That takes some discipline and grit but maybe you will learn something along the way. Remember, you must be selective in whom you choose as a mentor. You will want mentors with character and experiences. The greatest assets to our growth journeys are ordinary people.
The idea behind having a mentor is not new. Most of the successful people I have read about have had great mentors and in turn, were great mentees during their life’s journey. “A mentor is someone that allows you to see the HOPE inside yourself.” -Oprah Winfrey. What a great quote in helping each of us find out who we are and who we are becoming. Mentors should NOT just be your friends. That may not serve you well in the end. Mentors should be someone that we are not competing against or that is competing against us. Mentors should have their “Crap” together and are free of too many insecurities life throws at us. That means you need to find someone who is comfortable in their own skin.
I have tried the practice being mentored and of mentoring others during my lifetime. I wasn’t always successful but when I did make a good connection, the relationship went to a new level. My mission was to LIFT others up because I needed a lift myself. I was interested in learning from inspiring people. It helped me listen, gain confidence in life, be empathetic FOR others, manage stress, develop patience, wisdom over knowledge, resilience, and helped me get out of my comfort zone. I also learned to manage my fears, work toward cooperation, helping people get what they wanted and needed, dealing with money, becoming productive, and help people quit worrying about the small stuff in life. These are just a few of the benefits of being a mentee or mentor. Being a mentor means that I also learned about myself from those that I was mentoring. Another Win/Win situation.
Mentoring is a process. We all need help and following yourself isn’t a viable option for effective growth. That means you need to start being self-aware. When you become aware, one of two things can happen:
- First, (and the most common) is when a person’s pride swells up and he/she cannot bring him/herself to ask another person for advice.
- Second, the other reaction is to HUMBLE yourself and say, “I need your help.” That decision only leads to greater knowledge, but often develops maturity. It reinforces the fact that people need one another, not just when they are young and starting out, but their entire lives.
When looking for mentors, you may need more than just one. Think about what impact a mentor could have on the four areas of your life; Spiritual, Emotional, Physical, and Psychological. Try putting a name to each one of those areas and ask for advice. It just might turn into one of the best exercises you will ever encounter.
Go seeking a mentor in your life. Find YOUR “Mentor Match.” They are looking for you and you just might end up helping them as well.
Elevator Guy