JUNE 30, 2023
Last week we talked about how you know when you make a good connection with others. We gave you some pointers on what signs to look for whether one on one or in a group. To be successful, you need to learn how to really communicate with others. In fact, the secret to your success is “Connecting with others.” It all starts with your attitude and understanding the value of people. Just let people know that you care about them, and you will have accomplished your first step.
John Maxwell, author of “Everyone Communicates Few Connect” shows us the principles behind connecting with others by, focusing on others, expanding your connecting vocabulary beyond just words, marshalling your energy for connecting, and gaining insight in how great connectors connect. You acquire the practical skills of connection by…
- Finding common ground
- Making your communication simple
- Capturing people’s interest
- Inspiring them
- Being authentic
Most people have a “Self-focused” mind-set. Every conversation is about them. Every communication is an opportunity for them to demonstrate their brilliance and share their expertise. Good teachers, leaders, and speakers don’t see themselves as experts with passive audiences they need to impress. Instead, they see themselves as guides and focus on helping others learn. They value others. They don’t live for positive feedback. You don’t always have to be impressive. Don’t try to get ahead by correcting others when you should be trying to connect with others by understanding them. (UMP = Understand Me Please) It’s not about you anyway. Connecting is never about me. It is the person whom I am communicating with. If you want to connect with others, you must get over yourself. You will have to change the focus from inward to outward, off of yourself and on to others.
Maturity is the ability to see and act on behalf of others. Immature people don’t see things from else’s point of view. (Empathy) They rarely concern themselves with what’s best for others. As Maxwell points out, “maturity doesn’t always come with age; sometimes it comes alone.” Only mature people who are focused on others are capable of truly connecting with others. You can talk until you are blue in the face, but people know in their gut if you really care about them. Many of us have grown up in a very positive and affirming environment and didn’t lack confidence. That isn’t the case for many people. When a speaker is insecure, he will seek approval from his audience. The more he wants to seek approval from them, the more engrossed he becomes in himself and how he can impress others.
Here at UNICO, try thinking and acting in a manner that connects with others. (UNICO; “Where connections make a difference”) We aren’t in the insurance business serving people, we are in the PEOPLE business giving risk advice. You had better have a “Service Heart,” because it is all about others. (Your customer) That is what it takes to succeed.
Elevator Guy
Quote for the Day; “If you first help people get what they want, they will help you get what you want.” Zig Zigler