NOVEMBER 12, 2021
FEAR
What is YOUR EQ? (Your Emotional Quotient) In 1995, psychologist Daniel Coleman wrote a great book titled; “Emotional Intelligence.) (Check it out) Ms. Teri gave this book to me years ago and I have enjoyed reading it again. While many in the academic world value IQ, I like EQ because it addresses our responses to everyday social interactions and challenges. Since I probably have an average IQ, I have learned over the years to understand myself by my EQ. This has helped me navigate life. While IQ is important, I have also learned that there are other factors of intelligence that many of us have in one form or another, that allow us to navigate life by understanding our strengths and NOT by others, in saying how smart we are or not. I have seen too many “so-called” high IQ people struggle with relationships and with themselves, because they lacked the social skills in getting along with other people. Remember, good relationships are one of the most important parts of life.
The emotionally intelligent person acknowledges emotion (We all have them) in him or herself and hopefully in others. The key is; “Don’t believe everything you feel.” (Trust but verify) We should, however, be concerned about how we react to our emotions. Are you one that loses his/her temper at the drop of a hat or do you feel so much more superior to others that you can’t even see the log in your own eye? Yes, we should keep in-check and master our “Dark Emotions,” but we should understand and know ourselves before we going flying off the handle at others. Often times, people stuff their emotions. Be careful because if you stuff enough emotions over your lifetime, you may end up an old depressed bag of bones. Think more positively about your emotions and let them out from time to time. Go for a walk or a run. Take time to cry and talk about your feelings with others. Exercise or just take time to pray or meditate. It will serve you well into the future.
Over my lifetime, I have dealt with and studied emotions from many types of people. I have always been interested in what makes other people tick so this is how I learned to understand others along with understanding my reaction to others. Personally, I consider myself to be a highly emotional and sometimes impulsive individual. My job is to tame my emotions but not stuff them. I try to make them a positive in looking for the good in life. (“Tell me something GOOD”) For you men out there, don’t worry about breaking down in front of other men. This disarms any sense of competition among others and allows for an open dialogue. Don’t be afraid (fear) to share with others. They have them too.
We are all “blessed” with emotions. If you can deal with them in a positive manner, you just might learn to understand yourself better. That way, you don’t have to “hide” from others when you are feeling low. How do you think and act on your emotions? Is it in a healthy manner or do you let them consume you until you turn to the dark side by trying to find other addictive outlets. Try transforming your thinking and your reactions to your emotions. Remember, life is not all about you anyway. We each have a choice as to how we react to our emotions. When you are in a deep relationship, do you always have to dominate by being the strong one or are you able to share your vulnerability with another. Try letting others in once in a while.
If you are interested more in emotions, find someone that inspires you. (Look for a higher power here) Someone that sees something in you that you can’t see in yourself. Then don’t be afraid to openly share, I will guarantee you it just might be the most freeing experience of your life.
Elevator Guy
Quote for the Day: “You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in your mind.” Dale Carnegie