MAY 21, 2021
CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY
When I get deep into a conversation with friends, I can’t tell you how many times I hear or notice in that person; “I just want to be happy.” Don’t we all? Remember, life is based on the choices we make and the decisions we make daily in carrying out our personal vision or goals. (Choose wisely) But HAPPINESS is not a helpful goal. It is too vague and abstract. Try writing down or sharing with others, (Mentors) YOUR definition of happiness and you will see that it may become a never ending discussion which may end up impacting each of us in a negative manner. You see, none of us are very good at predicting what makes us happy. We try hard to think about it. We look at others and their success, we look at social media to see how well others are doing compared to us. (Don’t compare) We look for what works and what doesn’t; generalizing experiences and making predictions in our future. “If only I had more money, were smarter, were better looking, were taller or had more hair; (That is a good one for this cowboy) THEN I would be happy. God doesn’t care how you look to others. He is only concerned with your heart and mind, not that you are RIGHT all of the time.
When we start thinking too much about our happiness, we end up making wrong turns where we end up developing bad habits. Then we don’t even know what happiness IS because we are trying or working too hard to MAKE ourselves happy. Many of us often end up in a downward spiral of addiction or self-deprecation that makes it difficult to recover. (Love yourself in a healthy manner) I see this in many depressed individuals who are in the same funk, ALL of the time. Remember; Happiness is a choice, so choose to be happy.
The good news is that we actually have a lot of control over our own happiness. By doing the right things we can form better habits and create an upward spiral of happiness. (As the Elevator Guy, think about an elevator taking you up and the feeling of “Lifting” you get on that climb to the top) Your thoughts can be good (Positive) thoughts or evil (Negative) thoughts. Don’t run with those thoughts unless your brain has a chance to decipher what is right for YOU. That means you need to associate only with people that make you better and not drag you down into THEIR world. (Try “Lifting” rather than knocking others down)
I enjoyed Eric Barker’s (No relation to Bob Barker HA!) book “Barking Up the Wrong Tree.” If you are looking for your own definition of success, this is a must read. Barker reminds us that “Happiness is a CHOICE you make.” We are all in different seasons of our life. But whatever season you are in, Barker reminds us to be more intentional by spending MORE time with what has always made you happy. Some of those include the following:
- Express Gratitude
- Find Purpose
- Double down on GOOD relationships
- Love (Accept) what God throws at you whether it is good or bad. (Amor Fati) There is always a lesson in our failures and setbacks.
We have talked before about hanging around the wrong people. Don’t hang around those that are unexcited, uninspired or ungrateful. Remember, life is meant to be lived to the fullest. That means you need to get out and get active. Do more stuff. More little good things, beat a few great things when it comes to happiness. Do more things to get more results. Be more social. (“No man is an island” Unless you CHOOSE to be) Work on unhelpful habits. This means your first step is to think about what you like. (Write it down and think about it) This means you have to think about “growing” a better YOU. Finally, Try using our first step in our Band of Brothers Daily 7; What are you Grateful for? You don’t need to buy anything or do anything to feel happier. You just need to appreciate what you already have.
You can choose to be happy or not. Your choice will impact your health and how positive you can be in your life. Now GO and be happy.
Elevator Guy
Quote for the Day: “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Abraham Lincoln